Grade 4A Knox Primary

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Show don’t Tell

June14

This week we are learning to show the reader and not just tell them.

Show sadness.
Writing โ€œshe was sadโ€ would tell me what she was feeling. Instead, show me what sad looks like. Is sad staying in bed and not getting dressed? Missing work? Not taking a shower and eating only potato chips?

Show anger.
Tell: He was angry. How can you show anger instead? Is anger throwing pots? Or is anger not talking?

Show fear.
Tell: She was scared. Instead of writing that, how would you show fear?

Show surprise.

Choose one of the prompts above or think of your own emotion or adjective. Take fifteen minutes to write a piece that shows us that feeling, then post it in the comments.

What emotion do you think other people have tried to show?

by posted under Uncategorised | 67 Comments »    
67 Comments to

“Show don’t Tell”

  1. June 17th, 2019 at 6:01 am      Reply Neeko Says:

    Hi 4A,

    Guess what my emotion is!

    The little girl curled up into a ball in her warm and cozy bed and wanted to stay there for the rest of her life. She felt tears running down her pale face. She couldn’t bear to open her eyes, she didn’t want anyone to see her wet and pale face especially not one of her family members because they would ask why she was crying.


  2. June 17th, 2019 at 6:16 am      Reply AQUILA/BOB๐Ÿˆ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜Šโ›ธ๐Ÿ€โ›ธ๐Ÿ˜ Says:

    HI 4A,

    here is my Emotion

    a boy has just scored a goal for the win and is jumping up and down screaming YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH
    we win , we win and once he had finished screaming he had a very big smile


  3. June 17th, 2019 at 8:09 am      Reply Anonymous Says:

    was your emotion Aquila exited.


  4. June 17th, 2019 at 8:11 am      Reply lisa๐Ÿ˜‹ Says:

    hi 4A,

    guess what my emotion is

    the girl bolted to her room as she through a book at the wall and punched her pillow “grr” she growled at her fave toy (a little stuffed deer) “why does today have to be so bad?!” she shouted to her (calm) mom.


  5. June 17th, 2019 at 8:21 am      Reply Zane/pancake๐Ÿฅž๐Ÿฅž๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿค‘๐Ÿฅ…๐Ÿฅ…๐Ÿ๐Ÿ๐ŸฅŠ๐ŸฅŠ๐ŸฅŠ๐ŸŽฎ๐Ÿ”ฌโš— Says:

    hi everyone,
    guess what my emotion is

    he walked to school with his head held high and yelled to everyone “look at my brand new watch which comes with diamonds and ruby and emeralds and gold and more.meanwhile i sat on the bench and said “he honestly thinks he is the best person in the school if not the world


  6. June 17th, 2019 at 8:53 am      Reply Imeth. Says:

    Hey Aquila, I think your emotion is ecstatic!


  7. June 18th, 2019 at 6:14 am      Reply jordyn/bobby :]๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜ชโค๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜ช๐Ÿคโค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค Says:

    Hi 4A

    guess what my emotion is
    the boy lined up for a goal but… he missed the siren sound. the game was over and his team lost. His head was held down low and there were big puddles of water under his feet and at home he didn’t want to get out of his room.


  8. June 18th, 2019 at 8:35 am      Reply Rainbow๐ŸŒˆ Says:

    HI 4A

    can you guess what my emotion is

    As I woke up I smiled to myself I threw my blanket to the ground I Jumped off my bed and changed my clothes and brushed my teeth.”HOORAY”Its finally the time to go to Starbucks cafe .my teeth were glued together as I entered the car.

    From Rainbowโ˜•


  9. June 18th, 2019 at 8:41 am      Reply Anonymous Says:

    DEAR 4A can you guess my emotion

    the girl came back from school with her head down as she slammed her bag on the wall she sat on the bed and tucked her feet to her chest
    when her sister asked her what was wrong a tear rolled down her face and she started to cry ” I GOT BULLIED TODAY JUST LEAVE ME ALONE” SHE SOBBED (*crying)


    • June 20th, 2019 at 12:13 am      Reply Hosna๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’›๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’š:) Says:

      this one was mine


  10. June 18th, 2019 at 8:56 am      Reply Imeth. Says:

    Hi 4A, try to guess my emotion,
    ” yeeeeeaaaaahhhhh!” Conor yelled, he had just scored the winning run of the Norm Reeves Shield final! The next day he had a huge grin plastered on his face!


  11. June 18th, 2019 at 9:00 am      Reply Christian Says:

    dear 4A can you guess my emotion

    The boy got home form a big day of soccer when he got in
    side he went to his bed and fell in face first and fell asleep.He was snoring all night and was 2 hours late for school.

    can you guess my emotion???


  12. June 18th, 2019 at 9:58 pm      Reply YUMETH๐ŸŽฎ๐ŸŽฎ๐ŸŽฎ๐ŸŽฎ๐ŸŽฎโšฝโšพ๐Ÿ€ Says:

    The boy curled his hands into a ball his blood was boiling. He wished he could get out there. People saw steam coming out of his ears his turned a very hot color of red. he was super duper hot he thought he was 900000000 degrees Celsius.

    Guess my emotion.

    GOOD LUCK!


  13. June 19th, 2019 at 12:59 am      Reply Minwoo/STEVE/MINI Says:

    The sad boy curled up into a rock as the big kids bullied him the big kids were laughing until he’d leave. The boys face was red with tears coming out of his eyes his face was covered in water.


  14. June 19th, 2019 at 6:34 am      Reply Abby Says:

    Hi 4A do you think you can guess my emotion???

    Sherii dragged her legs up the stairs ” Now I don’t get to play with Crystal & Lucy” Sherii sobbed. She hugged her Fave dog toy. Then she burst into tears.


  15. June 19th, 2019 at 7:42 am      Reply Sara Says:

    Hi 4A,
    the little girl trudges home she doesn’t say hi kindly like she does on a normal sunny day the clouds are gloomy as she quietly tiptoes up the stairs and she doesn’t usually eat ice cream after school but she got a huge tub of ice cream she just ate it scoop by scoop by scoop


  16. June 19th, 2019 at 9:41 am      Reply Matthew/sausage Says:

    the boy was tight a ball with goosebumps and tears
    his legs where stuck to the floor
    his body was frozen for an hour and a half


  17. June 19th, 2019 at 10:48 am      Reply Amy/sausage Says:

    I went home and did my homework I couldn’t open my eyes but still I have to play piano after I went in my bed room and fell asleep on my bed.


  18. June 19th, 2019 at 9:44 pm      Reply Nadsta =) Says:

    Hi 4A!
    Her blood boiled and she clenched her fists in fury. She gritted her teeth as rage built up inside of her.
    What emotion am I?


  19. June 20th, 2019 at 5:59 am      Reply Mia Says:

    Dear 4A,
    she curled up into a small ball and was trembling with fear!
    She had a single tear roll down her cheek and roll down on the floor with a splash!

    Can you guess what my emotion is?


  20. June 20th, 2019 at 6:35 am      Reply Tai/Tia๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’–:) Says:

    Mia, Is your emotion sad?


  21. June 20th, 2019 at 6:47 am      Reply Scarlett๐Ÿคฉ๐Ÿ‘ง๐ŸŽ‡๐Ÿฅž๐Ÿš—U_U Says:

    hi 4a,

    There I was under my planket, my and were as cold as ice and my legs were full of goosspumps and I scream, ‘I am done with this movie, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH.’ I stood up and sand there still like a frozen like I was in winter. I slowly walk up in to my dark scary room and the door shut on me, ‘ AAAAAAHHHHH,’ I screamed so loud that it wake up the up the house Mum and dad had to calm her down, so they toock her to bed nd she finally fell a sleep.

    Hey 4A can you guess what my emoshen I am showing you not telling you,we will see?


  22. June 20th, 2019 at 7:42 am      Reply peter/Jeff Says:

    I think Mia’s emotion is sad


  23. June 20th, 2019 at 7:59 am      Reply Chaz Says:

    hi 4A,
    can you guess my emotion?

    “i’m so pumped for school today!” i said while i was quickly getting my teeth done. i through my bag on and get ready for school. “it’s only 5 am!” my mum shouted when she was still in bed.


  24. June 20th, 2019 at 9:24 am      Reply Sithum ๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ™‚๐ŸŒญ๐Ÿ•๐Ÿ”๐ŸŸ Says:

    Dear 4A
    on last Friday when i heard the home time bell and quickly grabbed my bag and ran out of the classroom.๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ


  25. June 20th, 2019 at 9:38 am      Reply tran Says:

    hi 4A guess my emotion

    my blood was boiling red i snapped my pencil when i was doing my homework it is dreadful so bad. it feels like a i am sitting there and doing nothing. i got sent to the principals office when i got to school because i have not been doing homework since Term 1

    Did you guess my emotion???


  26. June 20th, 2019 at 9:54 am      Reply Mali yao Says:

    Dear 4A, Guess my emotion

    I just opened a present for my birthday that was my favorite. I yelled and gave a big smile on my face. My eyes grew bigger and bigger! ‘ My favorite toy!’ ‘Yes’ I shrikes!!!!


  27. June 20th, 2019 at 9:55 am      Reply tran Says:

    i clutched my hand they were boiling and my face was boiling red. my blood was about to explode out of my body


  28. June 20th, 2019 at 10:30 am      Reply Anonymous Says:

    Hi 4A,

    Guess what my emotion is!…

    The last session came to an end. “NOOOOOOOO! I haven’t finished making my Project!”My hands turn into fists, My teeth push together!

    What’s my emotion? good luck!


  29. June 20th, 2019 at 11:34 am      Reply frank_Isaac๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿค‘๐Ÿค‘๐Ÿค‘๐ŸโšฝIsaac/Bob Says:

    hi 4’s
    try guess

    my fist clench as I was being dobbed by CJ (Chalindy). I was about to punch her but I know I can’t. My face was as red as a tomato, my blood was boiling and air is coming out of my ear like a heat wave.


  30. June 20th, 2019 at 11:47 pm      Reply peter/Jeff Says:

    I think Isaac’s emotion is angry.


  31. June 21st, 2019 at 2:36 am      Reply jacky/bread i think Says:

    As i walked to my room i said to my self why do people bully me i stared to cry mum came and said can i come in i stared to sobb i dont like school


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